Doing Hard Things: Why They Matter for Growth, Joy, and Legacy

I recently did something that was hard. I felt vulnerable, fearful, overwhelmed, out of my league — and I still did it.

Hard things are… well, hard. They stretch us in uncomfortable ways. They bring up self-doubt, sweaty palms, and the urge to run in the opposite direction. But they can also be opportunities: moments of growth, the start (or end) of a chapter, and the spark for a journey you never imagined possible.

When we lean into hard things, we often discover strength and resilience that we didn’t know existed.

The Power of Perspective

Here’s the truth: we don’t always get to choose whether a hard thing shows up in our lives. Sometimes the diagnosis comes, the job shifts, the relationship changes — and there we are, face-to-face with something we didn’t ask for.

But where we do have a choice is in how we view the hard thing.

• We can see it as impossible and shut down.

• We can see it as terrifying but still take one shaky step forward.

• Or we can see it as an opportunity — a chance to write a new story about our courage, our resilience, and our values.

Here’s the key: the difficulty doesn’t change. What changes is the story we tell ourselves about the difficulty.

Psychologist Viktor Frankl, a pioneer in meaning-focused therapy, said: “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” In other words, the situation may remain hard — but our lens, our mindset, and our sense of meaning can transform the experience.

The Science of Doing Hard Things

Positive psychology research shows that growth doesn’t come from comfort. It comes when we stretch into what psychologist Carol Dweck calls a growth mindset — the belief that challenges are not signs of inadequacy but invitations to learn.

Another branch of research, led by Angela Duckworth, highlights the role of grit: passion and perseverance for long-term goals. Grit doesn’t mean things stop being hard; it means we keep showing up, fueled by purpose.

And that’s the secret: purpose is what turns hard things into meaningful things.

Remembering Your “Why”

Recently, I was asked why I was doing something that felt so exposing, exhausting, and vulnerable. My answer came without hesitation: because it’s part of my legacy.

I want my grandchildren and great-grandchildren to have a record of courage, persistence, and truth to look back on. I want them to see that fear doesn’t have to stop us — that hard things can be steppingstones, not stumbling blocks.

The second time I was presented with a similar challenge, it didn’t suddenly become easy. I still felt the nerves, the doubts, the weight of it all. But this time I carried my why with me — and that shifted my entire story around the experience.

Life Is an Adventure

Life will continue to present each of us with moments where we face the hard thing. Some will be chosen, some will not. What matters most isn’t how flawless we are in navigating them, but whether we show up at all.

Life is an adventure. Doing the hard thing is part of that adventure. And when you can see the hard thing as an opportunity — for growth, for meaning, for connection, for legacy — you begin to write a story of resilience and joy that will ripple outward for years to come.

So, the next time you’re faced with something that feels overwhelming, ask yourself:

• What is my why?

• How do I want to remember this moment years from now?

• What story do I want to tell my children and grandchildren about how I met this challenge?

Hard things will always be hard. But they can also be the doorway to your most beautiful and purposeful chapters.

✨ As a coach, I help people reframe challenges, rediscover their strength, and move toward a life rooted in joy and meaning. If you’re facing a hard thing right now and want support in shifting your story, let’s connect.

Thanks for reading...

Lynn